Getting a divorce is one of the hardest things we can all go through. When there are children involved, it means we’ve got to put a lot of our emotions to one side for the sake of being good parents. Learning to be an effective co-parent in this situation is a massive learning curve. Even though your relationship hasn’t worked, your parenting can. Let’s show you how you can co-parent effectively after a separation.

Have an Open Dialogue With Your Your Co-Parent

This is one of the fundamentals and is a prominent part of a child custody attorney’s mediation strategy. But it makes sense to keep an open dialogue with your ex-partner. For the sake of the children, keeping each other informed of events and schedules that could affect the children will make the relationship work. It can be difficult, but you have to guarantee that you are keeping each other informed about every change because if you do not, and your child becomes the key source of information. This soon results in crossed wires, which also makes your child feel like they are right in the middle.

Keeping Both Households Consistent

Children need structure, and this means that in both households, you’ve got to keep a similar approach. When you run a tight ship in both homes, this will create routine and security for your kids. No matter wherever your child goes, they know that certain rules will come into play, so they can have a greater sense of well-being. That sense of the unknown is what every child fears, so having the same environment in both places creates that all-important consistency.

Remove Emotions from the Equation 

As hard as it is to separate your emotions, you’ve got to recognize this is almost like a business arrangement. As tempting as it is to try and make a big custody grab and have the children full-time, you’ve got to remove your emotions from the equation and be realistic about your commitments. If you work a 60 hour week, are you actually going to be able to be an effective parent full-time? When both of you hit a realistic schedule that caters to everyone, this will make life a lot easier. You should also remember that, even though you and your partner are not together anymore, this doesn’t mean your ex is a bad parent. You’ve got to realize that just because your ex and yourself didn’t work out, it doesn’t mean that you can’t both be better parents. It is still possible for both of you to be great parents, and in fact, you may find that you are better at working together when you are not together.

It is not easy, but you must remember that for the sake of the children, you both have to provide consistency. You and your ex-partner love your children, and this means that your child needs the love of both of you. It is a hard balance to get right, but you should not be an unbalanced parent. This is why it is so important to provide a united front.