Category Archives: Parenting

How My Daughter is Saving My Life

She is 3 months shy of being 1 year old, and my daughter is already a hero. Although she may not be aware of how and why she’s saving daddy’s life, she is doing it nonetheless.

Over the years, I have found ways to become increasingly stressed about everything. Always having something to do, thinking ahead and worrying about what’s to come, getting mad at minute details, etc. Guilty with a capital “G”!

Going Mom has given the best support a husband could ever ask for over the years, and she’s what kept me from going berserk! Now I have her and Avery as a trusty sidekick.

Stress Fighters/Life Savers!
Stress Fighters/Life Savers!

I recently wrote about our long journey to having Avery and how a big part of our problems was a result of what stress had done to me physically. It sucked, I was miserable, and so was everyone around me. I never considered that stressing so much could be such a powerful and dangerous force, but now I know stress is a proven killer.

This is beyond scary! Something that many of us consider to be purely mental, can actually lead to our demise. Armed with this “stressful” knowledge, I am working on making changes to remove myself from the dangerous mindset. Becoming a stay-at-home dad is one major change and I wrote several times on how that has helped reduce my stress tremendously.

Make no mistake, I still have a ways to go before I stop stressing over things, just ask my wife! A little stress is natural and even good for us, but I still worry too much about washing dishes, food, exercise, always having a plan, and never living in the moment. I once lived in a carefree world, and now I’m striving to go back there.

With the help of my beautiful wife and daughter, I’m slowly (read, slowly) lowering stress levels and re-learning how to live “in the moment.” Since most of my time is now spent with Avery, she has been helping me in many ways; all unknown to her. Yes, babies are hard work and create plenty of stress themselves, but that’s a different kind of stress, not one that can kill!

One way Avery helps is by simply being so adorable. Every time I look at her or at the thousands (literally) of pictures of her, my heart fills with joy and I feel instant happiness set in. How can you not be happy with that smile?

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I’m adamant about exercise, and thanks to our awesome baby, she’s happy to join along in her jumper. There’s nothing like finishing a set of very taxing squats and turning around to see this girl so excited about life.

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But, probably the biggest factor in Avery saving my life by reducing stress is with play. She still has a ways to go before she can really start to play, but she’s active enough for a little rolling around and tickle time! Avery “plays” a major role by keeping me in check throughout the day.

When I’m standing over the sink washing dishes and she’s crawling all over the floor around me, I make it a point to stop and get down to crawl with her. The instant I’m on the ground and I see her smiling back at me, all of my worries disappear.

Daughter vs Dishes....hmm, easy choice!!
Daughter vs Dishes….hmm, easy choice!!

As she grows, Avery’s playfulness will grow with her, and I will be right there to play along in the dirt, swing in a swing, jump on a trampoline and pick her up when she falls. All while caring less about the materialistic things and more about emotions and family.

Of course, I still make it a point to clean those dishes and do other chores, but the fact is, I’m having less of a “must do it now” mentality and learning to enjoy things more often.

I know my mom and wife are thinking “What!?” because I admittedly still get worked up over small things. Again, I have a long way to go, but it’s a start, and I feel that as Avery grows and becomes even more playful, the bad stress will diminish. The stress that replaces it will be more of a beautiful “I have a child and I’m raising her” kind of stress, and I’m happy to take it on!

Do you feel yourself getting over-stressed? Any ways of coping with it?

Has your child helped or hurt your stress levels? I know, I know, kids are stressing, but you know what I mean!

Learning to Walk: Is it Wrong to Place Bets on your Baby?

As long as it’s just among friends and family, it’s fine, right? Not like I’m setting up an online betting site where people around the world can place wagers on when Avery will start to walk. Plus, how would they know if I rigged it or not?

I could rig it and say this counts as "walking"

I could rig it and say the above picture counts as “walking”. Or if she’s in her walker, that must count, no?

Ummm, no, dad, this doesn't count.
Ummm, no, dad, this doesn’t count.

Not that I’d actually try to make money by creating a gambling business centered around my daughter, but I’ve been making bets with myself on when she’ll actually take her first unassisted steps. I was thinking she’d do it before 9 months, but that’s only 5 days away, so now I’ll revise to before she’s 10 months.

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What do you think?

Here’s several pictures of Avery showing signs of progress, please let me know your thoughts and we’ll see how close you are when it actually happens!

Walker in training.
Walker in training.
If only those feet would go flat!!
If only those feet would go flat!!
This is my "Spider-man" impression....
This is my “Spider-man” impression….
On the tip toes
On the tip toes
Flat feet!!
Flat feet!!
Sup, dude?
Sup, dude?
You need something?
You need something?

I’m feeling pretty confident her crawling days are numbered. Should I be scared or excited?

Enjoy your Sunday!

My Wife Wins Again, Our Baby Throws Food, and More Banana Fun Facts #5

Why must I be so stubborn all the time? Even if I know I’m (probably) wrong, I still end up trying to stand my ground. This part of me seems ingrained deep within, and I’m sorry to those who have to witness my hardheadedness.

Recently, okay, almost everyday, but still, work with me here, Going Mom and I had slight disagreement about something. It’s one of those small things most couples will argue about at least once; the toilet seat.

As the one who stays home all day, takes in a lot of caffeine, and subsequently pees a lot, I always keep the seat up. It makes it easier for me to go in, do my business, and get out back to Avery. Months ago, I even wrote a post defending my “right” to leave the seat up.

In that post, I clearly thought I won this argument fair and square. Turns out, the dispute was still unsettled. During Avery’s bath time, Kelly asked me in a nice tone to please start putting the seat down since Avery is now mobile and can easily make her way to the toilet. I stubbornly said “Just don’t let her.” as if it is always that easy, and thus our small argument began.

We kind of ended the tiff without further discussion, and I resorted to asking other dads on the Dad Blogger Facebook group I am a part of. The responses quickly came one after another with the majority of other dads taking not mine, but my wife’s side. After several of them mentioned crawling/walking kids getting into and possibly drowning plus just having really “pissed” (ha ha, get it?) off spouses, I realized my battle was lost; just like before Going Mom wins again.

So, to my wife who I still haven’t told that I now keep the seats down, I am sorry. Hopefully you’re reading this post today and can find forgiveness; you always do! 🙂

Now that I’ll be putting the seats down after each use, I’m looking into getting toilet seats with the soft/slow close hinges. I live in constant fear about making a loud noise when Avery is sleeping, and slamming the toilet seat is the last thing I want to do, so it only makes sense. Thanks to all of the dad bloggers who pointed this out!

Another “issue” we’ve been having lately is Avery throwing her food on the floor during dinnertime. This is the only time we give her solids since she’s still on breast milk, but she used to actually eat a little before just tossing the food. Before, she’d accidentally drop food on the floor and we’d laugh thinking it’s cute, but now she’s fully aware of what she’s doing.

Goodbye, broccoli!!
Goodbye, broccoli!!

Going Mom still laughs and does a bad job at hiding it, but it hurts me to see good food go to waste. I realize this is part of raising a baby, and I accept it, but no reason to laugh at her which I think makes her think it’s okay.

What, it's not okay?
What, it’s not okay?

I’m pretty sure discipline at this age is frowned upon, so I just try and tell her that’s not okay to do, and then I’ll take a bite of my own broccoli in hopes that will help. So far, it doesn’t….

Another healthy snack for the dog.
Another healthy snack for the dog.

Go ahead, laugh at me, you more experienced parents, I know it only gets worse. Oh well, it’s hard to ever stay upset with her for more than a minute; hopefully that never changes!

Maybe we’ll start introducing fruit to see if she likes the sweeter things. We wanted to start with veggies so she wouldn’t get used to sweeter things first, but I know bananas are always a tasty treat! Speaking of, I have some more banana fun facts in continuation from last Friday’s post.

  • The fastest marathon ever run by a competitor dressed as a fruit was 2 hours, 58 minutes, and 20 seconds—recorded at the Barcelona Marathon on March 6, 2011. The runner was Patrick Wightman from the United Kingdom, who dressed as a banana.
  • A few varieties of wild bananas include bubblegum pink bananas with fuzzy skins, green-and-white striped bananas with pulp the color of orange sherbet, and bananas that taste like strawberries when they’re cooked.
  • Banana peels are actually edible if cooked.
  • A man in India once ate 81 bananas in a half hour.
  • More songs have been written about bananas than about any other fruit.
  • The scientific name for banana is musa sapientum, which means “fruit of the wise men.”

I’m off to enjoy the rest of Friday now, hope you do the same! Kelley is having a girl’s night out tonight, so it’ll be just Avery and me for bed time. It shouldn’t be too bad…..as long as she actually eats her veggies!!

Do you have any tips/tricks on how to not let your child throw food? Or should I just give in and accept it?