bathroom Archives - Page 2 of 2

Bathroom – A room containing a bathtub or shower and usually also a sink and a toilet.

Solace – Comfort or consolation in a time of distress or sadness

No, I’m not sad, far from, but as a parent, aren’t we all a little distressed? If you said no, what pills are you taking?

As I was minding my own business looking at other people’s business on Facebook, I happened upon this picture from Someecards.com:

I am not a woman, and I only have one baby, but this pretty much sums up how I feel.

One reason I look forward to the weekend so much is that Going Mom will be home and I can sit in peace in the bathroom when the need arises. And shi….I mean sit in peace I do!

For the other five days, Avery gets to hang with me every morning around the same time (consistency is good!) while she stares. Or, sometimes, I get lucky and she’ll just fall asleep…

Poor wife, she has to wait on me to make breakfast on Saturday and Sunday morning, but I usually have an extended “me time” in the bathroom. 30 minutes is usually the max, then it gets uncomfortable; probably like you if I go any more into detail. Sorry.

But at the same time, not sorry. I mean, as a parent, you have to be comfortable with bathroom (i.e. potty) talk. I’ve only been a dad for 5 months, but I have a feeling poop, pee, and even puke (the three P’s) are a big part of raising a child.

If you’re a soon-to-be parent, get comfortable with the three P’s now. Practice by talking about how you need to tend to your “business” with your friends and family.

While at a big social gathering for the holidays or any occasion, just announce when you need to go; add how badly for extra points. Awkward looks will follow, but stand strong and flash a confident smile as you walk to your announced destination!

Many people see potty talk as taboo, but it’s something we all have to do and should be able to speak freely about. You don’t have to go into specifics, I do with certain people, but there’s no reason not to talk about it with others in general.

It’s quite obvious I am comfortable with and even enjoy bathroom talk from some of my previous posts…..

Going Mom and I are very open about our bathroom ventures and I feel our relationship is that much stronger because of this. Hiding anything is never good in a relationship. I mean, amiright? We even all go to the bathroom together! Whoa, not like that, just to clean it….

Protesting the cleaning by slouching and kicking her Firefly toy off... — Protesting the cleaning by slouching and kicking her Firefly toy off…

I don’t want Avery to be scared to discuss her bathroom needs either, so we’ll all be open together. If you ever engage in conversation with us, just be prepared!

I have always enjoyed bathroom time as my peace and quiet time, but now I’ve grown to seriously cherish it. Vacation? No thanks, I’ll just go poop.

What are your thoughts towards talking about the bathroom?

Do you refuge in bathroom often?

Yesterday, Avery and I made our usual two store grocery trip to Sprouts and Costco in hopes that we won’t have to go this weekend. We live only a few miles from the Texas Motor Speedway, and since it’s race weekend, driving anywhere is worse than most days.

Since we don’t head out until after her morning nap, I some work in the kitchen to tend to. I try to make Kelley’s meals in bulk so I am prepared for a few days out, so I readied four ready-to-be-grilled bean and goat cheese sandwiches. Sometimes, I wonder why I don’t make one for myself…..

Oh yeah, because I’m more of a roasted beet, Brussels sprouts, and garlic kind of guy.

I could find something to do/cook in the kitchen all day, but Avery makes sure that never happens. She woke up from her morning nap with loud moans permeating the baby monitor. She was in an area the monitor couldn’t capture, so I went in her room to see what all the fuss was about.

How a sleeping baby is able to roll around and get their leg stuck in the slot of their crib, I haven’t a clue. Luckily, she didn’t hurt herself and seemed fine once Daddy was there with a camera in her face.

I liberated our daughter from her self-induced leg restraint and gathered everything to head out. Our first stop was Sprouts, as usual, and the urge to use the restroom suddenly hit me while perusing the aisles. Damn multiple cups of green tea and coffee!!

As I stood at the urinal, I looked down at Avery in the Onya Baby Outback carrier and tried to keep her from letting out any random cries as she generally does. Why she has to fuss as I hopelessly stand at a urinal, no clue. But, as I tried my best to offer soothing words, I paused and realized what I was saying might be taken the wrong way considering my location.

Then I thought back to the countless times before when I was wearing Avery and had to use a public restroom. “Crap” (not literally), I thought to myself, “Anyone in the restroom at the same time must really be questioning what they heard from me!” I know if I were in a stall and heard some guy talking in a soothing, coo-like voice, I wouldn’t come out until I knew he was gone.

So, I listed the top ten things a dad should never say while wearing their baby and using a public restroom. And if you’re wondering, yes, I have said all of these to Avery. It’s a surprise I’m still allowed in these stores!

To help you see things from my perspective.

Don’t worry, you’ll get bigger. (I said this to Avery when her head couldn’t see over the carrier.)
Well, hello there.
Uh oh, I need to get you a burp cloth.
Daddy won’t take long.
I’m so proud of you!
What do you see up there? (This is when Avery is looking up at the ceiling.)
Mommy is going to be so happy to see you!
Please stay still so I can finish.
Are you hungry?
If you’re good, we can play with that new toy at home.