Tag Archives: bottle

Bathroom Puns and No More Bottles!

06/12/2015 R.C. Liley 8 Comments

Nothing like a few Friday bathroom puns to pass the time until you officially start the weekend, right? Obviously, I could do more than just bathroom puns, but then I’d never get crap done. Ba-Zinga!!!

Wow, we’re off to a great start already! I’ll be sure to keep things moving to avoid a clogged brain. Butt first, I want to share what makes me so happy to say “goodbye”. We are done with bottles!

As you can see, Avery was a little hesitant about putting them up, but I told her she has new sippy cups to use since she’s older. She asked to use a bottle just one more time, or maybe she was flipping me the bird…..

Whatever she was saying or telling me, the bottles are gone now and I’m happy to put them behind me. Her last use of the bottle is documented on yesterdays Milk Life #MilkDrive campaign post. Which, by the way, would be totally cool of you to help our Southern team of dads out and donate for the great cause. I mean, I am giving you bathroom puns here. 🙂

Yeah, please help families in need. Oh, and tell me where the bottles are hidden.

It seems like she should’ve been done with bottles already, but I think this is quite normal, especially for breastfed babies. Which, by the way, my awesome wife is still nursing like the rock star that she is! Now, about those diapers……

Ahhh, diapers, perfect segueway to bathroom puns; enjoy!

All of the toilets were stolen in the police station. Detectives have nothing to go on.
A man was having issues peeing and asked his doctor what it meant. “Urine trouble.” the doctor said.
Constipation is a pain in the ass.
My whole family has problems with diarrhea, it runs in our jeans.
Urinals are pretty tough, they take no crap!
You can never hear a pterodactyl urinate because its P is silent.
A house without a toilet? Seems uncanny.
Everyone had fun at the park, but after dropping my watch in the toilet, I had a crappy time.
The toilet was backed up from feeling crappy, but when I said it had beautiful porcelain skin , it was flushed.
Life as toilet paper has it’s ups and downs. You’re either on a roll or taking crap from some asshole.

True, some of these are corny, but I think a lot of us will agree that the cornier the better. Right? Anyone?

Well, I hope you don’t feel like this was a waste of your time. Enjoy your day and have a great weekend!

When did you get rid of the bottles for your kid or are you still using bottles?

Do you think it’s easier with or without the nippled containers?

Life, Parenting

Our Toddler’s Dance Video & A Bottle Trick

03/21/2015 R.C. Liley 2 Comments

Avery has been dancing for a couple months now, and I shared a dance video of her getting down with Jay-Z trying to get that “Dirt Off Her Shoulder” in the past.

A video posted by RC Liley (@going_dad) on Feb 20, 2015 at 9:27am PST

I love watching that over and over, it never gets old, but I’ve been wanting to capture another version of her dancing for a while, and was finally successful. No matter what she’s doing in the house, when the intro music to a podcast I’m listening to comes on, she’ll stop and just bust a move wherever she is.

There have been many failed attempts at getting this on video, but here is my short, but successful video capture of Avery getting down.

I love it! Just another thing that will never get old and I’m happy to be able to share it. Go ahead, watch it again, I bet you’ll laugh harder than the first time. If not, go away, it’s cute and I don’t care what you say!

Today’s post is short and quick since we’re at the DFW Family Expo along with our Dallas Dads Group to be part of a Car Seat Safety Workshop put on by Britax. Going Mom and Avery will have plenty to do and see as I help with our group, but I hope to spend time with my girls too. I’ll fill you in on how it went.

Before I leave, Avery wanted me to show you her new picking up a bottle without hands trick.

First, you have to have it on a flat surface. Or the curved seat of daddy’s indoor rower sitting in the kitchen. Make sure to angle yourself just right before going in for the latch.

Then, with full concentration, latch on to the bottle and bite down hard so it doesn’t drop! Side note: do not do this when actually nursing from your Mommy!

That’s it! Once you’ve accomplished the trick (if you’re good like me), go ahead and reward yourself with a good drink of Mommy’s milk; the best stuff on earth for growing kids!

Annnddd back down to do it all over! One more time after that and it’ll be a successful hat trick!

That’s for the NCAA March Madness followers out there. 😉

Speaking of, I filled out my first bracket ever and had no idea what I was doing. I thought I’d have beginner’s luck, but so far, I suck.

Meh, not a big deal to me.

Are you following March Madness?

How’s your bracket doing?

Any dancing kid videos you’d like to share?

Life, Parenting

Dear Daughter, Hold Your Bottle! Please?

02/21/2015 R.C. Liley 2 Comments

I don’t know where we went wrong, but our toddler simply won’t hold her own bottle.

Okay, let me rephrase; she won’t hold her own milk bottle.

Dammit! Let me re-rephrase; she won’t hold and drink from her milk bottle. There.

Some of our neighbors with kids around the same age said their little ones have been holding their own bottle and drinking without a problem. I don’t know where they all are with breastfeeding and if that matters, but Going Mom is still breastfeeding so maybe that has something to do with it. If that’s the case, so be it, breastfeeding is the best source of nutrition for our kids, even as toddlers, and I’ll support my wife as much as possible!

But still, Avery has no problem with holding, grabbing, and throwing things. She’s even becoming a pro at kettlebell swings!

So why won’t she just tilt the bottle up to get what’s inside? We have a sippy cup with a straw that she drinks water out of just fine, but a lot of it ends on the floor too, so we’re reluctant to give her Mommy’s milk that she works so hard to produce.

I’ve tried bottle “training” by just putting water inside and letting her do whatever, but nothing good came of it. Just confusion and spilled water.

If that was milk, we’d have a sticky mess, and I don’t feel like cleaning the floors more than I already have to.

Kelley and I have attempted to let her hold the bottle with milk inside while we stood guard, and she just tried to drink from the nipple as if it were the straw on her sippy cup.

We try and correct her by making a motion of tilting something up and drinking, but that only seems to confuse her.

And then, after several repeated attempts at explaining what to do with the bottle, she gives us this…

I mean, what the crap?! How do you not just smile, hug, and kiss this cute girl? After holding the bottle so she can drink, that is.

Anyway, we’re talking about weaning her from the bottle all together soon, and then she’ll have to use the sippy cup. Our cup has a spill proof nipple or a straw attachment, and she’s kinda getting that nipple down, but still just spits out the water as she drinks. I picture milk being in there and it sends shivers down my spine. Not out of fear, just because I don’t like cleaning, and I know how hard my wife works to make that milk.

The time to nix the bottle is fast approaching, and hopefully she’ll get the “big girl” cup down good enough to have milk in there.

Do you have a special “go to” sippy cup that you use for your kids?

What age did your little one start holding and drinking from their own cup/bottle?