Tag Archives: humor

4 Things Babies and Firecrackers Have in Common

Happy Independence Day to my fellow Americans, and Happy Friday to all others! Both great things, and both reasons to celebrate!

We’re heading down to G-Ma’s to celebrate the 4th of July weekend with Uncle Preston (if he’s around) and G-Ma’s boyfriend, Paul. This will be the first time Avery gets to watch fireworks, and we’re not too sure how she’ll act. Any tips?

Growing up, I remember getting tremendously excited around New Year’s and the 4th of July because that meant fireworks!! When I was old enough, I would have my own yard sale trying to sell anything from some of my old books to jewelry I thought my mom would never miss.

For some reason, some boy sitting in the front yard with a few things laying on a blanket never got me very far. I earned some money, though, but mainly out of pity from the neighbors. I even tried my shot at a Kool-Aid stand which earned a bit too. Same reason…..pity.

With my earnings, I’d ride my bright neon Huffy bike to the firework stand nearby and spend it all on whatever I could afford. The stand owners were parents to one of my friends, so they’d always toss in a few extras.

I couldn’t afford the big fireworks, my sympathetic mom helped there, so I mainly came back with a lot of Black Cat firecrackers. Probably for the best since trying to ride bike while carrying several artillery shell fireworks would be ill-advised.

Not 30 minutes after arriving back home and I’d be out of my hard earned fire ant disrupters. Man, for such a small thing, those firecrackers are pretty potent!

One day, while Avery was screaming because I set her down for a second, I reflected upon my past obsession with firecrackers and came up with 4 things they have in common with babies. I figured 4 is a good number for the 4th; see how intuitive I am?

1. Both are small but loud. When compared to an adult, babies are small, cute and (usually) cuddly, right? Likewise, a firecracker pales in comparison to the enormous fireworks you’d see at a major firework display. Despite their small packaging, babies and firecrackers can and do create quite a racket.

The firecrackers are self-explanatory; you light them and they go “boom!” Babies do a great job at creating loud noise with just their vocals, or by grabbing anything nearby and banging it on anything else nearby.

Door stops make great noise!!
Door stops make great noise!!

Although, unless you have one of those strands of 50,000 firecrackers set to explode one after the other in sequence, babies tend to make noise for longer periods. And, unfortunately, it’s not on cue by lighting a fuse, it’s all on their terms!

2. Both are good at exploding. While firecrackers themselves explode, babies tend to create explosions by other means. But, after either one “explodes” you have a mess to clean up.

The paper wrapping and any remnants from an unfortunate toy might be scattered across the ground, while babies leave their aftermath inside a diaper, on the floor, up their back, in the tub, in the car, in the…well, you get the idea.

3. Both have a short fuse. You ever try to light a single firecracker? Those things explode before you can turn the other way after lighting, and a lot of people, me included, just light and throw them quickly as they explode before touching the ground. Not safe or smart since you eventually have one go off in your hand which feels far from good.

I'm happy.
I’m happy.

Babies, on the other hand, can be as happy as a clam at high tide for one moment, but if you so much as take your attention off of them to scratch your head, they can go irate! This happens to Going Mom and me frequently; we’ll have Avery laughing as we coo at her and make funny faces, but we stop to talk to each other and WHAM! she’s crying.

No I'm not!
No I’m not!

4. Both need to be tightly swaddled/wrapped. We haven’t swaddled Avery in months, but when we did, it had to be a tight wrap. If it wasn’t tight enough, she’d get her arms free and thrash around like a short circuited robot. For a firecracker to work as intended, it needs to be very tightly wrapped around the powder inside.

Happy, swaddled Avery

If you’re celebrating today, I hope you have a fun and safe time wherever you are. Happy 4th of July!!

Can you think of any other semblances with babies and firecrackers?

Bear Fight in the Ninja Turtle Fort

Remember Avery’s tutorial on How to Fight a Bear last month? You know, instead of sitting still for us to take her 7 month photos, she decided Teddy needed to know who was boss?
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It’s me, I’m the boss.

We thought she made her point clear, but apparently the bear didn’t learn his lesson. When word about the ninja turtle fort spread across the nursery, Teddy Bear challenged Avery to another duel on her new stomping grounds.

Being the fearless daughter of two courageous parents, Avery was quick to accept, and luckily I had the camera to catch it all on film. Is it really called film? Maybe just all on memory card? Bah, who knows?! Anyway, back to the action….

[youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jqNPLqSvFOs&w=560&h=315]

I’d say Avery made it rather clear she’s a force to be reckoned with. I love her victory dance at the end; it’s reminiscent of the “Halo Hump/Teabag” you would do on your fallen victims during online play.

As you might’ve noticed, we still have the TMNT fort standing like I first posted about on Tuesday. In that post, it seemed Avery was not enthused by the shelled superhero mutant turtles or my crafty fort, but now she’s taken a liking to both!

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The very next day, first thing upon waking and feeding, I got her in there for some playtime and she had a blast!

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The pictures speak for themselves, huh? Now I need to find some quality TMNT toys from my childhood, the originals.

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Another dad blogger commented on Tuesday’s post and showed me part of his Ninja Turtle collection via instagram. Needless to say, I’m jealous.

Well, as you can see, I did say that! So, now I’m on the hunt to find some of the originals for myself Avery. I have no clue what I ever did with mine, and all I found in my mom’s attic were old TMNT puzzles.

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We did have fun putting them together that night, but I want the toys!

If you know of a person or place I should look, please let me know. As long as they aren’t too pricey, I might consider getting them; after my loving breadwinner of a wife approves first! I love you, Kelley! : )

Speaking of my mom/G-Ma, we’ll be going there for the 4th of July weekend, so I better start getting my food packed. I typically bring several of my own eats which includes Brussels sprouts, tuna, egg whites, a nut and seed mix, and plain Greek yogurt.

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Yep, all staples in my diet! It’s not that she doesn’t have a lot of good, healthy food, but I always hate to take other’s food (even my mom’s) I guess because I know how valuable it really is.

Do you have certain foods you like to have with you wherever you go, or can you just “wing it” with whatever’s available?

5 Pet Products You Can Use for Babies

We have a full blown crawler on the loose! Geez, once they catch on to something, they waste no time doing that something for-ev-ER!

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I know we asked for it, but of course we weren’t actually prepared. Avery is crawling everywhere and anywhere she can.

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Before, we could set her on a blanket after changing her diaper as we go wash our hands in the bathroom next to the nursery, now she just crawls to us while in the bathroom!

Guess I’ll be vacuuming and mopping a lot more now!

Yep, I love watching our little girl being so proud to move around more, but that means I really have to watch her. It used to be fairly easy when all she could do was roll and maybe thrust, but now if I take my eyes off of her for a second, she might be across the room or climbing something dangerous.

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The other day I was vacuuming in another room while she was on her blanket playing in the living room when all of the sudden the vacuum just turned off. I went back in the living room to see she had crawled and yanked on the cord. She was nowhere near the socket (thankfully!), but needless to say, no more cords around when she’s down!

We have a gate for babies ordered and on the way, but I’ve been wanting something else that’s portable to bring into the garage for when I work out or when we go to G-Ma’s. In my search, I kept seeing pet playpens show up, and at first I just waived them off, but then I started thinking; maybe that would work for babies too!

This mode of thought led me on a search for other pet products that could double as baby products too. The only downside might be that you’ll have a jealous pup to deal with. Here are my top 5 “baby” items that might have you heading to your nearest pet store.

1. Pet Gate – I know, this one is obvious, and most are even marketed with “for baby/pet” wording, but it’s in pet stores and is highly recommended for both baby and/or pet. I’m sure many use these gates to keep their babies and pets separate…..for their pets’ safety!

2. Chew Toys – Teething baby? No problem! Of course, make sure the material is safe and not coated in anything toxic to babies. Here’s a great rope chew toy made with all natural materials and dyes, and the product description even mentions it’s great for teething puppies. Hey, puppies are babies too! Plus, your child is sure to love having a cute snowman to chew on.

3. Portable Pet Playpen – The reason I started looking for other baby products posing as pet items, some of these look and transport better than ones specifically for babies.

This one on Amazon costs about $45 after shipping, but the Summer Infant Portable Playard is $99.95.

Both have carrying cases and setup in seconds, but the pet playpen weights less than half of the Summer Infant one. Just saying…

4. Toy Ball – Every baby should have a toy ball; they’re great for developing motor skills and hand-eye coordination. Why not a ball made for dogs? This one I found online from Only Natural Pet is eco-friendly with all recyclable materials, mint-scented, and easily washes clean. Plus, there is a glow-in-the-dark option which I think a baby would enjoy more than a pet and it’s made in the U-S of A!

5. Pet Beds – C’mon, you can’t say you’ve never looked at those cozy beds with plush side bolsters and seriously considered trying to curl up in one. How cool would this be for your baby and/or toddler? They would love it! This one from Only Natural Pet is eco-friendly, resistant to liquid, dirt, and oil, and reduces the spread of bacteria and allergens. I think it’s better than our mattress!

Of course there are other pet items that might work for babies like leashes and harnesses, but I’m not sure how safe that would be.

So, next time you’re looking to get something for your growing baby, consider perusing the aisles of the nearest PetSmart before heading to Toys ‘R Us. If you have a pet and what you buy doesn’t work out for your baby, at least you know it won’t go to waste.

Have you ever let your baby play with or use a pet product?

If not, would you ever consider doing so?