Tag Archives: parenting

Congratulations On Becoming A Father…Now What?

07/26/2018 R.C. Liley Leave a comment

When a woman has a baby, it’s expected that you may run into the baby blues. Your wife or partner has just changed her entire body with a baby, gone through the rigors of labor and delivery and now they’ve got to deal with the physical and mental demands of breastfeeding and night feeds. It’s an awful lot for a person to handle at once, and it’s a shock to the system for new mothers. It’s also why postpartum depression is so common after a baby has been born. During the pregnancy, you – the father – can be an amazing support. You can attend appointments, feel the kicks and be there to hold her hand during labor, but the fact is that you experience the pregnancy in a very different way. Here’s the thing, though: you are the father, you don’t carry the baby and yet you are still at risk of developing postpartum depression.

It’s not something that’s well-known in the mental health community, as the diagnosis is still fairly new, but postpartum depression is absolutely possible in men as well as women. Women have a huge change that they go through, but so do men. Do you remember the moment that you saw your baby? Those beautifully tiny hands and those owlish eyes full of unknown wisdom? Well, you probably filled up with pride, pure, unadulterated pride. This is your child that you created and is your little piece of immortality to keep. Once those emotions have passed and settled into that unconditional love, the reality of the situation settles in, too. Every night, there is a baby screaming for food every three hours. You can’t leave the house without feeling ripped apart with guilt that you’ve left your partner with the squalling infant on as little sleep as you’ve had. You both are strung out on exhaustion and you’re trying to earn money to keep the bills paid and you’re sniping at each other. It’s quite a downward spiral.

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Over time, and before you know it, you’ve stopped laughing, you’ve stopped communicating and your mood stays low. You don’t want to go home after work and find you’re heading to the pub more and more often. You spend less time with your partner to avoid the rows and the screaming, but you feel a failure at the same time. These are all signs of depression in men, but you may not think about it at first. You may just blame it on exhaustion. You may dismiss how you feel and blame it on new fatherhood being an adjustment. The thing is depression is extremely difficult to admit to, and there’s no such thing as being able to ‘just get over it’. The positive thing? You’re not alone. The big life change that you’ve just gone through in becoming a father can result in post-partum depression and other mood disorders in men. The side effects and anxiety can manifest physically and can also leave you feeling worthless and on self-destruct. It may feel difficult, and it may seem like you don’t have a reason to complain because of your partner at home, but you do have a right to ask for help. It’s not a sign of weakness to admit defeat and speak to your doctor. It’s a strength to say out loud that you’re worried. It’s taking the steering wheel and guiding your own life back to where you want it to be.

Paternal postnatal depression is a serious condition and can lead to addiction and even losing your family. You can read leaflets about rehab centres like https://www.hotelcaliforniabellevue.com/ to get over an addiction started by paternal postpartum depression. You can also get the right treatment hashed out with your doctor so that you can go back to feeling more like yourself. With the right treatment, the right support and the fact you’ve spoken out about how you feel, you can overcome postpartum depression.

Being a new father is not easy. Paternal postnatal depression is very common and can happen to 1 in 4 men. You are adjusting to an entirely new life in your home and your whole life has been turned upside down. It’s stressful to go from being carefree to having a small, new infant needing you for everything. Even the times they need their mother, you can be left feeling rejected and left out of their new bond. It’s not okay that you spiral downward because of that but it’s important that you can understand the signs that it’s happening to you. There are things that you can do to recognise what puts you at risk for PPND, and some of those things are listed here:

No sleep.
Personal history of depression in your life prior to the baby being born.
A breakdown in relationship with your partner.
A lack of support from others around you.
Feeling rejected because of the new bond with the baby between them and their mother.
Feeling pressure about being a good father.
Money issues.

One of the biggest signs is that your partner is suffering with baby blues or postpartum depression because up to half of men who suffer with postpartum depression have partners suffering the same way. The birth of your child is emotionally challenging, and it doesn’t happen straight away. You can develop symptoms within the first year and there’s just no single answer as to why some men suffer with it and not others. It’s not something you find in the many baby books out there, but it can affect your relationship with your spouse. The most important thing to recognize is that you will need some help if your emotions can’t be handled. You can’t blame yourself for how you feel; it’s a hormonal issue that cannot be helped. What you can do, though, is find help. From as many angles as possible, you need to ask for help from everyone around you and admit to your partner how you are feeling. Admitting how you feel is the first step to overall recovery.

Life, Parenting

Options If You Cannot Conceive Naturally

06/29/2018 R.C. Liley Leave a comment

For anyone that is unable to conceive naturally, it can be utterly heart-breaking. However, rather than focusing on what you can’t do, you need to focus on what you can do. Luckily, there are many different options available for couples that cannot get pregnant. This does not mean that your dream of having a family is over. With that being said, let’s take a look at the various options in further detail.

Surrogacy

There are a lot of people around the world that decide to become a surrogate so that they can give other families the gift of a child. This is essentially when a woman carries a child for another person. In a lot of cases, the eggs of the surrogate will be fertilized with the sperm of the male.

Donor insemination

A donor could be used if the man has issues with his sperm. Single women and lesbian couples who wish to start a family also often go for this option. In most cases, people will utilize a sperm bank, which means the donor’s identity is unknown. However, if the child wishes to contact their biological father once he or she is an adult, they do have an option to do so.

IVF / In Vitro Fertilisation

IVF is one of the most well known options for couples that cannot conceive naturally. During this procedure, an egg will be taken from the female’s ovaries. It will then be fertilised with sperm in a laboratory. The embryo will then be put inside the female’s womb so that the baby starts to develop.

IUI / Intrauterine insemination

IUI tends to be used if there is no known reason why the couple can’t conceive or if the male has poor sperm quality. During IUI, a sample of the man’s sperm will be filtered so that only the highest quality sperm remains. This is then placed inside the woman’s uterus using a catheter. Success rates vary depending on age.

Medical and surgical treatments

There are a number of different medical and surgical treatments available, which are beneficial if there is a clear reason why a woman can’t conceive naturally. These treatments are designed to stimulate regular ovulation so that the woman can fall pregnant. An example of this is endometriosis.

As you can see, there are a number of different options for you if you are unable to conceive naturally. Of course, this is something that needs careful consideration, and you need to weigh up the pros and the cons of each option that is available to you. But it is good to start looking into each approach so you can discover more about it and find out what solution is the right one for you and your partner.

Going Healthy, Going Strong, Life, Parenting

How To Get Your Child Exercising

06/28/2018 R.C. Liley Leave a comment

Getting your child to exercise in the current day and age is often a lot easier said than done. After all, we live in a period whereby playing on video games for hours on end seems to be the norm. Needless to say, this is no good for your child, not only in terms of maintaining a healthy weight but also in terms of their development and their social life. With that being said, read on to discover some of the different ways that you can encourage your child to exercise.

Choose something fun – There is only one place to begin, and this is by choosing something fun. You can find some suggestions at mommypoppins.com. Your child is not going to want to exercise if you suggest something that he or she does not enjoy. The more a child enjoys an activity, the more they are likely to continue with it, and they won’t even see it as exercise either.

Limit computer and television use – If you are going to be able to get your child moving, you need to make sure that there is not something else that is more tempting, i.e. television or video games. Each child should only be allowed one to two hours of total screen time per day. This includes video games, computers, videos, and television. Once this time is up, they will be more encouraged to play outside because they know they can’t sit glued to the screen anymore.

Turn it into a fun family activity – You can use exercise as an opportunity to get all of the family together and do something fun. After all, we all need physical activity, irrespective of how old we are. There are so many different activities you can do, from laser quests, such as those at stratumhq.com, to assault causes. Why not get a different family member to choose the activity each time? You could do something every month or fortnight – whatever suits you and your budget best.

Provide active toys – The fourth and final tip is to buy your child active toys. Of course, you can wait until it is their birthday or Christmas to do so. If it is fun and benefits your child’s health, it is a winner! There are lots of toys that will encourage children to get outside and be active, from jump ropes to balls. Take a look online and see the different options that are available.

As you can see, there are a number of different options available to you in terms of encouraging your child to exercise. If you follow the suggestions that have been presented above, you should be able to get your child exercising more regularly. Not only will this ensure they get the physical activity they need, but it can help with other elements of their social and personal development too.