Tag Archives: tips

Avoid Awkward Silence as an At-Home Parent: Six Ways to Develop Early Vocabulary Skills

11/22/2014 R.C. Liley 4 Comments

Me: Hey Avery, are you hungry?

Avery: ……..

Me: Okaaayyyy, how about we try walking?

Avery: …….

Me: What’s wrong, did you poop?

Avery: ………

And so on and so forth. Thus is the typical conversation most parents have with their babies.

When you start life as an at-home parent your infant, silence is inevitable and expected. Sure, there’s crying and cooing, but unless you’re caring for other kids at the talking age, you have no one to actually converse with when at home.

We only have one kid, so it’s just Avery and me spending every day together, learning and growing along the way. I love it. It’s fulfilling, rewarding, better than sitting in an office (to me), way better than daycare (financially and physically), and it sometimes drives me INSANE!

Oops, did I say that? It’s not when she’s extremely fussy and screaming out loud, or when she’s pulling out my leg hair as I’m trying to cook meals for day; it’s the silence. Crying, I can take, but sometimes it gets quiet, a little too quiet.

Don't mind me, I'll just sit here and stare. — Don’t mind me, I’ll just sit here and stare.

As I first mentioned, it’s expected from an infant, but at a year old and close to making actual words with her babbling, it’s just awkward when she turns silent. I’ll be working in the kitchen as she’s happily pushing her boxes across the floor (yes, we’re classy) or we’ll be playing in the front room, but all too often, she turns silent and stares into space.

I know you’re thinking, “Must be poop!”, and I used to think the same, but that’s usually accompanied by grunting and a strawberry-red face. I’ll check anyway because you never know (right?), but 8.3 times out of 10, there’s no poop in sight……or smell.

Luckily, there are solutions to most problems in the world, and I’ve found six that help combat the awkward silence as an at-home parent. As she grows, many of these will act as a wonderful base to build upon and hopefully expand her vocab skills and mind.

1. Explain what you are doing. When I’m in the kitchen (it’s a lot!), I’ll catch Avery staring at me as I work. Instead of just carrying on in silence, I’ll explain to her exactly what I’m doing as if she’s a student anxious to jot down all of my notes. I do this for everything from the exercises I do when working out and even during diaper changes. This gives me the pseudo-conversation I sometimes miss and helps keep her engaged in daily activities.

2. Explain what they are doing. Since it would be narcissistic to only talk about yourself, describe the actions your kid is making too. This goes along with number 1 above, and will help them begin to understand their capabilities.

Yes dear, you are accurately portraying Chucky, the killer doll.

3. Make eye contact when speaking to your child. In doing so, your child may be more inclined to communicate. Of course, watch what you’re doing too; like changing dirty diapers!! I’ve tried looking into her eyes while explaining how I’m cleaning her bottom and next thing I knew, well, you know. #ParentingFail

4. Read to them often. Even when they can’t stand still and try to tear the pages from your hands as they scream, keep reading! Avery does this to Going Mom and I daily, but trust me, you’ll help build vocabulary skills and maybe even have them reading before others their age. Make sure to choose books with big, bright colors and fun pictures. Moby Dick is not the best book to start with. 🙂

5. Acknowledge their sounds and actions. When Avery started blowing raspberries, we made sure to return the action and let her know what she was doing. Now that’s she’s babbling a lot, we repeat (as good as we can) the string of “words” she spouts out and encourage words like “momma” and “da da”. Lately, Avery has become an expert at sticking out her tongue on queue and it makes my wife and I so proud!

6. Play music. You don’t have to have “The Wheels on the Bus” on repeat, play actual music, whatever you like, and it’ll be fine. This is a big one for keeping sane and having some kind of background noise at all times. Almost every day, I turn on Pandora with a mix of my favorite channels and frequently sing out loud with Avery staring at me in bewilderment. Despite the strange looks you might receive, have no doubt that your kid will pick up on words that help expand their vocabulary. For this reason, I tend to stay away from the Eminem station….

Although you can never fully escape the awkward silence when you’re an at-home parent with only one kid who’s not yet talking, these six solutions will help get you through this time and help build your child’s speech and learning skills as well.

Have you made use of any of these before?

Do you have other tips/advice to share?

Food, Friday Food Facts

Friday Foodie Fun Facts: Fennel and Fenugreek

10/31/2014 R.C. Liley 2 Comments

Happy Halloween, we’re celebrating Avery’s first by trick-or-treating and saying we don’t want anything but to say hi! Although today is Halloween and I should be posting something about how to avoid over-consumption of candy by your little ones as well as yourself, I wanted to share a post from my previous blog.

Ready to roll as a pumpkin! Original, I know.... — Ready to roll as a pumpkin! Original, I know….

Before I was a dad, I had another blog centered on healthy food called “Just Add Cayenne”. Obviously, you can tell I’m a fan of spicy food, but despite the name, I shared a lot of healthy dessert recipes/ideas too. You can check it out by clicking on the “Just Add Cayenne” page tab above and look around for a while.

I’m always interested in the health benefits of food and prefer to use it in place of traditional medicine whenever possible. For instance, I haven’t taken something like ibuprofen or aspirin for aches and pains in years; I use cayenne (hence the blog’s name) or ginger for their anti-inflammatory properties instead. I feel much better in doing so, and know I’m not sabotaging my gut lining or other insides as a result.

As I’ve mentioned many times before, Going Mom knows the importance of breastfeeding, and I’m extremely happy and proud that she’s giving Avery the best nutrition available. I mean, Nature’s pretty damn good at knowing what we need, and no formula or rice cereal will ever replace it! Unless you’re unable to for some reason, I see no good reason why you wouldn’t breastfeed your children.

Lately, Kelley has been concerned about her production and we’ve been looking for natural alternatives to give it a boost. She’s been drinking Traditional Medicinals Mother’s Milk herbal tea for a while now, but doesn’t always have time to brew a cup of tea with her busy work schedule on top of needing to pump. So, now I’m trying to boost things by adding fenugreek to her meals and soon we’ll have a fenugreek supplement to use too.

For the record, I think she’s doing fine and Avery doesn’t seem to complain (besides when she’s just a fussy baby), but either way, as you will see, there are plenty of other benefits to using fenugreek as well. Below is my original post from my old blog which also includes fennel since it’s another healthy addition to you meals. Plus, it made for a lot of “F’s” in my post title!

I have two awesome foods for you to add to your meals to create functional flavors that boost nutrition. One powder from the licorice flavored vegetable, fennel, and the other from an herb, fenugreek. Both of these have very distinguishable flavors that stand out in dishes. For that reason, you have to be careful because too much could ruin a dish.

These are both new functional flavors I’ve started to add to my diet and hope to feel a difference after using for a while. Fennel and fenugreek are known for alleviating annoying digestive issues (what? we all have them!) along with several other ailments.

Here’s a sample of fennel’s multiple health benefits, as listed on Organicfacts.net:

The health benefits of fennel include relief from anemia, indigestion, flatulence, constipation, colic, diarrhea, respiratory disorders, menstrual disorders, eye care, etc. Fennel, bearing the scientific name Foeniculum Vulgare Miller, or its essence, is widely used around the world in mouth fresheners, toothpastes, desserts, antacids and in culinary.

Fennel is a diuretic, i.e. increases amount and frequency of urination, thereby helping removal of toxic substances from the body and helping in rheumatism, swelling etc. It also increases production and secretion of milk in lactating mothers and since this milk contains some properties of fennel, it is anti flatulent for the baby too. It strengthens hair, prevents hair fall, relaxes body, sharpens memory and has a marvelous cooling effect in summer if the pale greenish-yellow water, in which it is soaked, is taken with a bit of sugar and black-salt.

And no, I am not using it for production of milk in my breasts. I’m neither lactating nor a woman; the indigestion and stomach relief is what I’m after. (Edit: And to boost Kelley’s milk supply too!) Read the full benefits of fennel here.

Fenugreek’s health benefits, also listed on Organicfacts.net, are:

The health benefits of fenugreek include relief from anemia, pregnancy pains, increasing lactation, digestion, loss of taste, fever, hair care, dandruff, stomach disorders, biliousness, respiratory disorders, mouth ulcers, sore throat, diabetes, inflammations, wounds and insomnia..

Most of these benefits of fenugreek are due to the presence of saponins and fiber in it. Fenugreek is also used for herbal healing. Its seeds contain a gumming substance called mucilage. Mixed with water, mucilage expands and becomes a gelatinous soother for irritated tissues.

Fenugreek is used to treat wounds, inflammation and gastrointestinal ailments. Fenugreek helps in antioxidation. So, it prevents and repairs damages caused by free radicals. According to ayurvedic and Chinese medicine, fenugreek can be used for inducing labour and aiding digestion. It is also good to improve metabolism and health. Irritated skin condition can be soothed by the external application of fenugreek. Fenugreek is also used for fevers and muscle aches.

Fenugreek is considered to be a safe herbal food. It is also used as a spice and tastes oddly of bitter celery and maple syrup.

Read more of fennel’s health benefits here.

Hopefully I will share a successful outcome with Going Mom’s production, but as you see, there are many other benefits to these foods and I recommend adding them whenever possible.

Have you ever used fennel or fenugreek?

Any moms out there that have tried boosting lactation naturally?

Do you have any new herbs or spices in your diet?

Life, Parenting

Raising a Tiny Superhuman: Getting the Best Advice from Ben Greenfield

10/14/2014 R.C. Liley 2 Comments

For the past few months, I’ve been enjoying listening to podcasts covering topics on fitness, nutrition, and obviously, being a dad. I have a few favorites on fitness/nutrition that I look forward to each week, but for the dad podcast, I only listen to The Life of Dad Podcast since it’s all you need for Dad-ertainment!

Regarding the fitness and nutrition podcasts I’m subscribed to, the one I listen to the most is from Ben Greenfield Fitness. Ben Greenfield is one of the world’s top personal trainers and wellness consultants who, in 2013, was voted as one of the top 100 most influential people in the health and fitness industry. Plus, Ben and his co-host, Brock, always put on an entertaining and informative show.

Since I’ve discovered his podcast, I’ve been listening along as I go on my daily walks with Avery. Hopefully she’s picking up on the great info too! As a dad to 6 year old twin boys, Ben frequently mentions the fun, creative ways he includes them in many of his exercise routines and has provided tons of advice on how to keep kids active and healthy. Or, as he puts it, raising tiny superhumans.

The world needs more tire flipping families!

Taking his words of wisdom on how to raise tiny superhumans, Going Mom and I have been implementing what we can to ensure Avery maintains her superhuman status all the way into adulthood.

Before she was mobile, Kelley and I would do workout videos together as Avery watched in her jumper or swing. Now that she crawls and is almost walking (so freakin’ close!), we depend on her jumper to keep her content as we workout.

We have a power squat rack with an Olympic barbell set in our garage in which I use to follow an upper/lower strength routine. We now have her jumper setup in the garage, and luckily Avery tends to enjoy this time making her own jumper workout.

I guess every day is “lower” day for her! Actually, with how much she crawls and pulls up on everything all day long, she’s getting a full body workout every day of the week. I’d say she’s on her way, if not already there, to superhuman status!

Ben also gives plenty of nutrition advice for kids (most adults should use it too!) that Kelley and I will surely use as Avery grows. For now, her main source is still breast milk, as all babies should have and deserve, along with steamed veggies and a little egg at dinnertime.

Going Mom and I also make it a point to get on the floor with Avery and simply play.

This does so much for a child’s development, and once she’s older I’ll add in a little rough housing too.

Ben speaks on this in his podcast, “10 Tips for Raising Healthy, Smart, and Successful Kids” where he brings up playing with your kids releases oxytocin in both parents and their children.

Seriously, if you’re a parent, go listen to that podcast now! Ben and his friend, Ari, give all kinds of great advice on ways to exercise with your kids and incorporate healthy food in their diets. Some of my favorite things mentioned are:

– Going to a park or any open field and let your kids practice kicking a soccer ball or throwing a frisbee as you sprint after them to “fetch” and bring them back. Upon returning, he then suggests doing 5 burpees together, or you can whatever you and your kids are capable of.

– Doing pushups and pullups with kids on back.

– If you work out at home, have mini versions of your equipment available so your kids can see and mimic your workouts. You can buy things like mini kettlebells and medicine balls made specifically for kids and I can’t wait to get both for Avery.

– Go on hikes and wear a weight vest to keep you from going too far ahead. Ben also mentions using an elevation training mask to make it even more challenging for you and I already bought mine to have ready once Avery is walking on her own. Then, if/when your kids tire, pick them up and carry them for a bonus challenge.

Elevation training mask + babywearing=not impressed — Elevation training mask + babywearing = not impressed

– Making use of essential oils instead of modern medicine. Use lavender oil on your kids’ pillow to help them relax and sleep peacefully or treat infections with oil of oregano. Even remove warts using lemon oil instead of the dangerous chemicals sold in most stores.

I could go on with a long list of things Ben and his many guests give on how to raise tiny superhumans, but I suggest you go have a listen or read for yourself. As a matter of fact, he has an awesome e-book titled “10 Ways to Grow Tiny Superhumans” you can download now and start incorporating his healthy advice today. And it’s not limited to just your kids, this advice is beneficial for us parents too!

For more informative articles Ben published on the topic of kids, check out this link to his website and have a look around.

I get antsy every time I listen to Ben mention some new activity he did with his twin boys as I can’t wait to do the same with Avery as she grows. That said, I’m not rushing her to grow up anymore….time is going fast enough as is!

Have you heard of or listened to Ben Greenfield?

Do you currently do anything active or healthy with your kids to turn them into tiny superhumans?

Disclosure: I was not compensated in any form for this post and all thoughts/opinions are strictly my own. That’s not to say I didn’t try though!!! 🙂