Dear Wife (aka Going Mom, Kelley, Best Friend, and Mommy), I caught you doing something basically every night. It’s nothing bad, but actually very sweet.
At night, after a lonnngggg day at work, after coming home only to be bombarded by the need to breastfeed Avery as I am asking you several questions before you have time to think, after you spend the little time left before bedtime playing with Avery, after you nurse her to sleep (or try your damnedest since she’s a crazy), after you finally lay down to relax, you do something that warms my heart.
You look up pictures and videos of Avery, as if just to make sure she’s really ours since it seems so surreal at times.
When you join me in the living room where I’m usually writing on this blog, I’ll glance over and see you watching an old video of Avery from your phone on on Instagram. Videos both from your account and from mine, like this…
Most times you have your phone on silent, but I can hear Avery’s giggles just like I know you have in your head while watching this.
And the pictures, we have pictures from months ago as well as current day that you will make your way through. Again, from your phone, on Facebook, or on Instagram, you scroll through and look at the wonder that is our beautiful daughter.
Even on those nights when you’re so tired you go straight to bed, I know you make sure to look through pictures and watch videos of our growing girl. Sometimes I hear the videos playing, but other times it’s just instinct.
I can see it in your eyes and from your actions, you absolutely adore Avery, and not even the world itself is good enough for her. There are times when you doubt yourself as a good mother, but I want you to know that doubt is complete nonsense! You’re the best mother and wife there is, and you make both Avery and me so very happy.
Please, never, ever, think of yourself as anything less than the best. There are times when we don’t hug as much as we should, and when we finally do, it feels wonderful and I don’t want to stop. Unless I have tea tree oil on my face and you have carrot seed on yours. 🙂
Basically, dear, I just want you to know that seeing you simply look at old pics of our daughter says a lot about how kind, loving, and caring of mother you are. Avery is the luckiest girl and Wes (Updated to include our 2nd child) is the luckiest boy to have you as a mom, and I, the same as my wife.
You’ll probably be paranoid every time you get on your phone at night, but don’t worry, I don’t sit and stare or anything, just happen to see our daughter on your phone. It’s precious, you’re precious, our family is precious, and I hope that never changes.
Kelley, I love you, thank you for everything you do!!
You know that crappy feeling when you get sick? Yeah, I wrote about my experience here. And then the awesome feeling once you recover? Of course I wrote about that, and you can read it here. Well, that crappy feeling is back, but not because I am “Down With the Sickness” (old song by Disturbed), it’s because now my family is.
Probably no thanks to me. Before I turned ill, all was honky dory in the house, and then Blam-o (or some other weird word for a noise), my body hurt and I was decommissioned. Several days and excellent spousal support later, I was feeling better and ready for a pint night date night with Kelley.
Not so fast, the sick bug or whatever it is/was must’ve grown tired of my old carcass and wanted to move on to something better. Like, for instance, my wife and Avery. Damn you, bug/virus/whatever you are!!!
After returning home from our date night, we had just enough time to read a book to Avery before she went to sleep. A few hours later, in the early morning, we woke to the sound of our daughter crying. Nothing new there, but it was worse and lasted longer than normal.
Kelley and I were both in her room and it was confirmed; poop. She had just let a hefty poo out for G-Ma while we were out, so we figured we’d be safe for the night. Ha ha, rookie parents, you’re never safe from poo!
This has happened before, so we cleaned her and Kelley nursed her to sleep. Done, problem solved. Ooooorrrr, problem just starting, rather.
Not long after getting her back in her crib, no baby monitor was needed to hear a hacking cat sound throughout the house. At first I thought is was our cat, hacking, but instead is was Avery, throwing up. Oh yeah, another first! She’s spit up plenty of times, but this was a first for real food to appear.
Poor girl, it was all over her sheet, blanket, and pajamas. Off with everything dirty, and replaced with clean items, Going Mom, looking a little weary (besides the fact is was 2am), nursed Avery to sleep yet again. Or so we hoped. Instead, she had round two, all over her new pajamas and Mommy.
More cleaning ensued while Avery seemed unusually happy as she flashed us smiles while we scurried around in clean-up mode. Kelley needed to take a shower and was only looking worse, so after we finished cleaning, I took a shot at just holding and rocking Avery to sleep. Milk seemed to not be what was needed anyway.
Upon finishing her shower, Kelley needed to get some sleep and went to bed after checking on Avery and me. Luckily, after tossing and spinning around my lap, Avery found a suitable position to fall asleep and we stayed like that for around 3 hours. I was in and out of sleep, and after G-Ma (she stayed the night since we’re close to her work) got ready and left, I laid Avery in her crib and made it back to our own bed.
Our freakin’ nursery chair doesn’t recline, so laying in our bed was like having giant pillow hands gently lifting me off my feet and soothing me into a nice sleep. I woke up to find Kelley still in bed and found out she turned even worse and was staying home for the day. Time for me to pay her back for helping me so much!
I cooked pumpkin teff for her and Avery in hopes they would keep it down, which they did, and tried to help them relax. Avery had several “runny” messes through the day on Thursday, but seemed to get over her symptoms by night came around. Kelley was weak all day and not up to much, but thankfully she’s kept everything down, unlike yours truly.
At the time I’m writing this, both of my lovely girls seem to be on the mend. Mommy has an extended weekend with us, so I gave her strict orders to get better so we don’t have another weekend of sickness!
How do you feel after giving your illness to others in the house?
What can we do differently to limit this happening, or is it just something that must “run its course”?
Going Mom, aka my amazing wife, has always been ah-mazing since the day we met, and this past weekend was no different. It’s been over 2 years since I’ve been sick, let alone going a day without coffee or fitting in a “needed” workout, but Kelley took care of everything in true awesome wife/mom style.
On Friday, I started feeling a little off, and not like my ‘Going’ self. I had just knocked out 30 reps of heavy-to-me barbell squats followed by high-rep front squats for leg day, so I attributed my weary status mostly to this.
Saturday, we woke up to our almost 15 month old alarm clock named Avery, and went about our normal routine with coffee and breakfast. And of course spontaneous bursts of crying for no reason followed by cute laughs and smiles. You know, typical toddler ludicrousness.
But things still didn’t feel right with soreness across my body. My legs were sore (blamed the squats there), neck and shoulders were tense (must’ve been a bad sleep), and I felt fatigued (again with the bad sleep). But I shrugged it off as I left Kelley and Avery at home as I went grocery shopping with orders to hurry home. The weather has been awesome here in Texas with highs in the mid-70’s, and we wanted to bring Avery outside to a playground.
The sun? I’m ready!
Upon my return, I promised to watch Avery so Going Mom could take advantage of the weather for a nice run. While my wife was out running, I brought Avery to the garage for a quick weight-lifting session. I would’ve run too, but I’m still nursing that darned fractured foot! Even though my body was telling me “no”, I pushed through a quick but intense barbell session followed by a tabata-style conditioning workout.
Afterward, I was gassed, more so than usual, and only feeling worse. Kelley put Avery down for a nap and we had lunch, but I just wasn’t feeling up for eating. Actually, nothing sounded appealing which is extremely rare, and by the time Avery woke from her nap, I was only getting worse.
Being the stubborn guy that I am, I pushed through our normal afternoon walk, but little slower than usual. I had prepared my dinner for the night earlier in the day, but as dinnertime approached, I had lost all appetite and was reduced to laying on the floor as Kelley and Avery played.
At least I had prepared Kelley’s dinner beforehand too, so all she had to do was heat it up as her and Avery had dinner without me. I wanted to help, but remained lifeless on the playroom floor as Kelley fed and bathed Avery. And, of all days, Avery went and dropped a “bomb” during bath time….literally, she pooped. But Going Mom was quick to action and “handled it like a champ” as she said on Facebook. I agree, she was more than a champ for this unpleasant Avery first!
It took all I had to be there to read “Goodnight, Gorilla” before Kelley nursed Avery to sleep, and then I went straight to bed. My normal routine of staying up until 1am was not happening; that night, it was 10pm sharp. That is, until I woke up as hot as a furnace and immediate rushed to make friends (or enemies depending how you look at it) with the toilet.
Almost every hour that night, I woke up in a cold/hot sweat and ran to the bathroom with no time to spare. It sucked….big time. Somehow, Avery slept through it all even though I was plenty loud. Silver lining?
All of Sunday, I felt like was a nauseous heap of uselessness with zero appetite and no desire for coffee. What!? Yeah, that bad. All parents know coffee is black gold and a “must” for survival, so missing it is serious business.
Since I felt a little better after the previous night, I joined Kelley and Avery for a nice weather walk to the neighborhood playground to let Avery run around. She can’t play on the equipment yet, but that didn’t stop her from having fun. No shoes needed!
That amazing wife of mine ran all around after Avery as I just laid there, watching, and sometimes smiling between painful stomach churns. At one point I tried to join in and hold Avery in the tire swing, but that was painful, and something tells me Avery wasn’t too impressed.
When Kelley took over, Avery’s mood “swung” the other direction to happiness. I hated being so miserable, but it made me smile to see these two grinning together.
We made it back to the house and I tried eating a little but still wasn’t feeling it. Instead, I pureed frozen organic strawberries with coconut milk for a cool treat that we all could enjoy on the warm February day. Avery and Going Mom approved, and even I was able to keep it down.
During nap time, I tried to read as Kelley did yard work, but couldn’t concentrate with my pounding headache, so I laid down for a nap. Napping is something I truly despise and refuse to do, but this day, I made an exception. I woke to my beautiful wife who then came back with a smiling Avery. If kids’ smiles can cure sickness, Avery’s is the best panacea around!
Kelley then broke out the vacuum and went around the entire house with Avery making sure to create several obstacles along the way. As I mentioned on a previous post, I vacuum every day, but missed it considering my circumstances, so her cleaning meant a lot. She does so much going to work for us that I want to take care of the household tasks, so it gets to me when I’m not able to.
My appetite remained absent, but at least I was able to sit with my favorite girls at the dinner table this time. Thankfully, I made our daily green power smoothie earlier in the evening and that provided some kind of sustenance for my body.
After our nighttime routine, it was another early-to-bed night for this sick SAHD. There was no more vomiting, but I did have other “runny” issues. Sorry if it’s TMI, but this is my blog! 🙂 Anyway, I slept a little better and had regained some sense of a desire for food come Monday morning.
Kelley went into work late and I made coffee (yes, one day without is enough!) for the both of us. I think I attempted eating my usual diet too fast and it upset my stomach, but I was happy to be able to move around. Despite feeling tired and not totally recovered, Avery and I made use of the warm weather by going for a walk and playing in the back yard. She even busted a few moves on the porch with the music I had playing.
What does dancing and dropping something hot have in common anyway?
And, that night, I had a full meal at dinnertime!
To my wife, Kelley, you always mean the world to me, and I can’t tell you enough how much I appreciate all that you do. To be so great and take over everything makes me love you even more than I though possible. Seriously, thank you, you’re a wonderful wife, mom, and best friend.
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How often do you get sick?
Are you usually caring for others or are others usually caring for you?
An at-home dad on a mission to keep it real when it comes to food, fun, and raising a healthy, happy family.
